A Grove of Ashes and Aspens

Now Playing: Midnight Madonna by Powerwolf

Currently, I sing in a community choir. As with most community choirs, this choir rehearses and performs in a church as a way to reduce expenses, since rehearsal spaces can get quite expensive, especially for larger groups. Many of the pieces we perform are also based around Christian themes and Christian texts.

This brings up a rather interesting type of imposter syndrome without it actually being proper imposter syndrome. How do I reconcile the Christian music that I sing in choir with my paganism, especially when so many Christians were (and many still are) so negative towards other religions?

In the way I go about it, it’s a matter of perspective. The music that I’m singing was made in worship to a god that I don’t believe exists. Just like how an atheist might participate in a religious activity with a friend but not believe in the god or gods of that religion, participating in the performance of Christian music as a pagan does not automatically entail belief in the Christian god.

I also hold the belief that music, regardless of the form or lyrical content, can be used as a form of worship within a pagan context. It’s not just writing pagan music; worship goes far deeper than that for me. A major part of how I practice my own paganism is through performing in some capacity. Right now, that happens to be performing mostly Christian music in a church with a choir of other teens and young adults.

I tend to look at it as a natural love of and knack for music and performance given to me by the gods, and who am I to look at that natural love and talent and just not use it at all? I know that natural talent will only get me so far, and I have to work at it if I really want to be a world class performer, and I do plan to at least try to find a band to play with. However, for the moment, I’m content to just do local performances with friends and local ensembles, and if that means singing mostly Christian music in a local choir, then so be it.

Music as a form of worship and practice can also mean composing your own music. I’ve been composing my own music in some capacity for years now. It takes me a while to properly write things and come up with ideas, but everything I write comes from that same love of music that drives me to be in a choir and perform.

The lack of choral music with themes in non-Christian mythology (outside of Wagner’s music, which is its own beast entirely) has recently driven me to want to write an oratorio drawing on the text of the Poetic Edda. It’s going to be a long project, likely one that will take many months, if not years. I will try to remember to share progress as it comes.